Most living things that grow start off in a seed form, usually in a smaller and less developed form than that which it will mature into, it’s the same way with men. From the moment of conception, we begin a process of transformation that continues throughout our entire life as we mature physically, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually. Throughout these developmental stages of life, we participate in a series of roles as a man.
THE CHANGING ROLES OF MANHOOD
Throughout this process we as men also take on a series of ever-changing roles, it is sometimes described as having to wear many different hats as we continue on our life’s journey. What follows is a list identifying some of the major roles we transition through as a man and what we learn through them.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Son
We all start off wearing the hat of being a son. In this role, we begin to grasp the importance of respect and responsibility, as we develop an understanding of our father's role in the family. Father-son relationships ultimately create the next generation of father-son relationships, and are therefore an important time of learning in the life of every son.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Friend
Throughout life, we often make many friendships, and understanding what being a friend entails is important to maintain those relationships long-term. As we wear the hat of being a friend we learn many lessons about loyalty.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Boyfriend
When we finally connect with the girl who will become our future wife, we learn many new life lessons. Some of the more important lessons we learn as we wear the hat of being a boyfriend are about emotional sensitivity and treating our girlfriend with the honor she deserves as our future wife. We also begin to realize that for a relationship to prosper, we must continue to work on ourselves as a man in the area of selflessness.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Husband
After we are married, our opportunity and the need to change ourselves is magnified, and we begin the life-long process of becoming one married couple rather than two single individuals.
It is within the sanctity of marriage, while wearing the hat of being a husband, that we learn much about the character trait of faithfulness. In this role especially, as we learn how to control our willful desires, we understand the importance of living a life of service. As head of the home, we have much to learn to become effective in our leadership role.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Provider
Traditionally most men wear the hat of being the principal provider for the marriage, although in more recent times this is no longer universally accepted. Wisdom and practicality should be applied as the couple assesses individual earning capacity and chooses what is right for their situation. It is often advantageous for both to work to help them become financially secure as a couple, especially in the early stages of marriage and before the arrival of any children.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Father
Wearing the hat of being a father is one of the most challenging, yet most fulfilling aspects of a man’s life. From the moment our child is born we will carry the responsibilities of fatherhood, as we lay down our own life for our family. In this role, we must attempt to master being an example to our children 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Although none of us do it perfectly, we should still strive toward this goal.
As a father, we learn the power of encouragement in the lives of children, and that our words can either hurt or heal. We also understand the value of consistency in discipline and our need for discernment in our relationship with our children and their peer groups.
As a father one of our most fundamental roles, is being the protector of the family and especially the well-being of our children.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Coach
As our children grow, we often have opportunities to wear the hat of being a coach to them, and to pass on the skills and experience we have acquired in a sport or hobby. There is immense satisfaction in watching your child pick up a skill you have taught them and reproduce it well on the playing field. Our role of encouraging them as a coach in their life often has a major influence in assisting the development of a long-term bond between you, that you can enjoy for years to come.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Guide and Counselor
As we watch our children grow, standing with them through the many challenges they will face we offer guidance and counsel to assist them in navigating life’s obstacles. As we wear the hat of being a guide to our children we can offer understanding and direction in specific situations to assist them. It is as we wear the hat of being a counselor that we can assist their self-development into maturity. By not doing everything for them, and sometimes allowing them to learn from their own mistakes along the way, they learn to use reason to understand the consequences of their actions.
Developmental Stages Of Men
The Role of the Mentor
Later in life when our children have grown up and we have already achieved credibility as a guide and counselor, we can begin to wear the hat of being a mentor. As an adult, they should now be making their own decisions, but when they are facing things beyond their knowledge and experience they can still come to you for advice on important matters. The role of a mentor is that of a person with credibility, experience, and wisdom who can assist another person through a respectful relationship as peers.
It is because of the natural evolution of the relationship over time that the father/mentor is no longer seen as an authority figure in their life that needs to be obeyed, but rather a friend to be looked to in times of need.
It is helpful to realize that as men we will continue to grow into the roles of manhood along the way, even as our children also grow. Although we may not be ready with all the answers for our children when they are born, we can confidently expect that our wisdom and understanding will also grow through our life’s experiences and we will be able to be there for them in their times of need.
God Bless
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